The Business of healing
The business of healing doesn’t vibe equally to running other types of businesses. For one thing, most sessions total 2 hours of your day when all is said and done! When someone bails last minute, a conversation really needs to happen to validate any range of fees, or no fee. To be fair, if you know you’re not well overnight, waiting until mid morning to cancel isn’t your best look. But as the therapist, you are perceived as a greedy, cold-hearted therapist to even charge a nominal fee for the inconvenience and then told to offer grace. Keep in mind, that 2 hours’ session was going to pay your electric bill. Where is your grace in this dance? I once had an attorney client compare his work day to mine. He stated that he didn’t get paid if clients no showed either. Not apples to apples. Attorneys charge a fee generally, and have other projects to work in whereas I’m just sitting with an empty table and not enough time to get anyone to take the space. You just robbed your compassionate care giver of options and her electric bill. Yet we warrior on and try to be loving, human teflon. But let’s be real! Are you in an ambulance, car accident, racing your kid to the ER? I won’t charge on that. That is insensitive. But let’s be real, it’s still a sizable hit and it hurts.
While compassion is at the root of any great, healing enterprise, it’s a tricky balance when it also means simply, running a business. If I gave in to every cancellation without assessing a fee, everyone would think how gracious and loving I am…or was…Where does she work now? Right, because it is a business and it will fail if you allow this type of transaction to bully your nurturing side into submission. I once had a very popular business man MIA for his session. I called to check on him first and foremost. Then, he decided to come late. Once we completed a much needed session, he looked at me like he was going to help me out…It was in this moment that he discerned he should offer to negotiate with me. If I reduced my rate, he would agree to come back by advance purchasing ten sessions. Mind you, this was about ten years ago before I was a specialist with an entirely different rate structure. I agreed to accept my pre-existing rate for one session. Happy to lose his business. He obviously didn’t respect me as a professional, so it would only get worse. Unfortunately, a lot of clientele learn how to be bad clients because most therapists are heart-centered, people-pleasers and won’t be firm with policies necessary to run a profitable business.
I put my everything into the session on the table and in the ether. I donate quietly to those in crisis. Even when I couldn’t afford a vacation and budgeted my food for the past several years, I still donated. I also show up. Therapists show up because we care. We check our messages on off hours to ensure our new clients are calibrating without alarm or any questions following a first or second visit. I even check in energetically with more concerned client welfare before I even get out of bed, without ever the consideration of a fee. I am constantly juggling and fine-tuning the inner mechanics to running this practice. I laughably feel like the Oz behind the curtain constantly updating, removing policies, researching face masks, hours texting because so many people won’t just answer a quick call which could have saved us so many texts. But I flex, I bounce, and I am human and a therapist who could use a hug instead of mean words. Therapists too often carry the brundt of the client/caregiver relationship. While we are there, full of heart, please be kind and courteous. After all, relationships are a dance.